marty's 1 to 29, behind the scenes | utah photographer

let's all hold hands and chant serenely, "we'll get through this together...we'll get through this together." because let me tell you that when the last few strands of daylight are slipping behind the mountains, and marty says to me, "we need to take your picture," and i haven't showered since, well, since, and i've spent the entire day yanking my shirt down to cover the fact that my stomach quadrupled in size in less than 24 hours, and my pants are never buttoned---well, i feel for my clients. because sometimes getting your picture taken is really really really super a lot hard. sigh. i want to support marty, really i do. but do you want to know what actually happens during picture time? i get all stressed out and suggest a million different things for him to try, and ask annoying questions like, "is the camera even on me? it doesn't even look like you're taking a picture of me....did you lock the focus? i didn't hear the beep....shouldn't i stand over there? are you even listening to me?" and on and on and on and on....and marty get's frustrated that i'm trying to "take control," and then i realize i'm my worst nightmare in terms of a client, and try to shape up, but by this time the shoot is pretty much over.

then i snatch the camera from him and scroll through the pictures mega fast, telling him all the things he did wrong and picking apart my appearance just like every other woman i like to pretend i'm not like. yes, i'm THAT mean, and let's not forget, hypocritical.

but, there's good news. namely that i married the most patient man on the planet, on every planet actually, including pluto before it got the boot.

second, i like this picture. even though everything i said about its circumstance is true (i ended up taking a five minute shower, insisting a wet hair portrait would be cool). even though i don't have any makeup on, and was not blessed with  eyebrows (though i hope in the next life?), even, even, even though, there is a limb chop i won't even mention...

i think this portrait is really nice. so thanks marty. you made me feel pretty. and i promise i'll do better.

p.s. people, don't worry, we have photos of other living, breathing humans we are excited to share soon!

uncle marty's second portrait, and baby update | utah photographer, idaho photographer

so i saw the dr. today. not my doctor. but the ultrasound doctor. i get to have some extra ultra sounds during this pregnancy because of what i so ominously mentioned before about the baby's "condition." i really feel bad for going and getting you all worked up and concerned, because truly, it appears as though things will be just fine with our baby boy.  you see, his umbilical cord (or is it mine? not sure how that all works out...) should have three  vessels, but his only has two (way to stand out junior! you know i enforce being different!!!). also, apparently this cord is truly delinquent because it decided to implant on the side of my placenta rather than the center....both of those things increase the risk of additional birth defects (none detected thus far), and a baby that may or may not be a little on the small side.  so the dr.'s have to keep a close eye to make sure he grows the way that he should. all things considered ---- namely one of my best friend's who just lost her brand new precious little one, and another friend who sadly miscarried at 9 weeks, we are extremely, extremely lucky.

and i think that's good to remember.

dear yan,

yesterday i did some reading on these cluster headaches i've been having.  the weirdest thing about them is how scheduled they are and that's how i know they're not migraines.  right now i'm having them at noon and 3 am.  remember in hawaii how i had them for over a month?  well, apparently that's normal.  and it's apparently normal to think suicidal thoughts because the pain is so intense (i must be either really tough or have a 'mild' case of cluster headaches although i did wish i could die once in hawaii).  i read one statement from a physician who said he believes cluster headaches cause the worst pain known to man (he mentioned childbirth specifically, but i still reverence childbirth as the pinnacle of pain).

i just want to thank you for being so sweet.  it warmed my heart that you got the medication for me this morning.  and i was so grateful that you took an initiative since a headache came on just as you came through the door.

sticking to the bright side, i'm grateful for the pain i've experienced because it's taught me to work and serve even though i'm uncomfortable.  it helped my self-esteem the other day when i helped my dad lay the floor through my noon headache.  and i feel better about myself when i can still be a nice person to everyone (especially our girls) even when i'm in extreme pain.  so i'm grateful for what it's taught me and made me believe about myself.  and i love you all the more for what it teaches me about you.  yesterday, when you said you were too self-absorbed, i couldn't remember ever disagreeing with you so strongly.  you are the most unselfish person i know.

i love you.

marty

one to twenty nine . number one / utah wedding photographer destination wedding photographer

dear yan fan, i've been getting these awful migraines.  and that's part of the reason why i haven't been entirely presentable the past couple days.  and to be honest, it's only part of the reason (nevertheless it is part of the reason) that i may have gone unshaven for several days now.  so today our barely two-year-old daughter wren came up to me and got close to my face.  she examined my scruff and in her adorable little voice said, "you like a porcupine."

(some of you have emailed me asking me to tell you when my daughter started making similes, so i thought i'd let you know).

today that same daughter made yan smile this adoring smile and i caught it in camera.  that moment becomes the first of twenty nine maternity portraits you'll see here in the next twenty nine days (not counting sundays - didn't want you to be disappointed when sunday rolls around).  it's a project i'm calling 'one to twenty nine.'  and yes folks, all of these portraits will be of yan.

aloha,

marty

i need to tell you something | utah photographer, boise photographer

doesn't it feel like so long since we've last talked? i am not loving the sense of disconnect i'm feeling over here. truth be told, lately there has been just way too much about work and  life that i'm not "loving," so much. so i'm changing it.

there's a lot i have to catch you all up on (can you say wppi, plus baby's status, plus didn't i open a studio?). but mainly i wanted to let you know that i finally feel like i'm about to break out of a slump, and i'm going to do it by simply being me. i've never been one to hold back. i'm the type that as soon as i meet you i want to show you my cellulite, admit my inability to multi task, and divulge the rest of my long list of flaws, just so you know who you're really getting. martin disapproves. hahahahha.

but that's me. and i strongly believe in being the best version of who you are are in favor of trying to be anyone else. how else can we honestly connect as fellow humans? =)

so look out, here i come, starting with a picture of my six month pregnant self in stretch pants. yes, it kind of hurts to post this. on the way to vegas, marty and i pulled over on the side of the road and worked some self timer magic. this was supposed to be for a submission to a bludomain contest (never happened, the details confuse me), hence us both wearing plaid shirts. however, good old uncle marty later revealed to me that he wishes we would have coordinated ALL of our WPPI "outfits," you know, to make an impact.

i love that man.

justin and trish | boise wedding photographer, utah wedding photographer

i couldn't believe it. there i was---all set to gather my things for my flight to boise for a weekend of work--go to double check departure time, and what do i find? i'm not scheduled to leave until next week. next week? next freaking week?!!! i needed to be in boise by the next day for work at 9am. the best part? non-refundable. good-bye $200. looks like the 6 hour drive to boise i was so proud of myself for avoiding this time around would come to pass after all. on no sleep. my eyes were already bloodshot. sigh. martin and i brainstorm, what's the best way to go about this little venture i was now referring to under my breath as the boise weekend from you know where (i'm so bold). we talk to our clients, and are able to push back sessions until 2pm the next day. martin and i would make an early 6am departure from provo. all would be well.

but then.

then it turned out a lot better than well. not only did martin and i get to spend some much needed quiet time together (girls were left home with grandparents) on the drive, we also got to meet trish and justin. then we got to spend the entire afternoon with them. trish and justing were so easy going and lovable, it was more like hanging out with friends than work. martin and i pushed ourselves creatively. we drove to a middle of nowhere type location (my favorite sort!) per justin's brilliant suggestion. and we got some of the loveliest photos we've taken.

so even though we turned right back around for a quick drive back home to our babies, logging in 12 hours of driving in one day total. martin and i arrived home feeling refreshed. that's what having wonderful clients can do for you. thanks trish and justin, let's do this again real soon (as in april for your wedding).